Just Dance

When Devyn hit the 18 month mark, I was so excited to enroll her into a dance class. She was always dancing around the house. Any time music came on, even for just a few seconds, she was dancing. So it was a no brainer to put her in dance. I signed her up and we went to the first class. Me, being the anxiety stricken mom, I really didn't know what I was in for. It was a mommy and me type class where the parent had to participate. I remember my anxiety being through the roof. I did not like this. Devyn was having fun, but she would not listen. She did not want to share the different stations with the other girls in the class. She wanted to do what she wanted to do. Not surprising. She gets that from me. Finally the first class was over. Maybe she was so out of control because she didn't get a nap or didn't sleep long enough. Maybe she was hungry. So my mom was the one watching her while I worked at the time. I asked mom (Mimi to Devyn) to give her a snack before I picked her up and to make sure she took naps on dance class days. The next week, I go in a little more optimistic. She's going to do better. She had a good nap, she ate, she's excited to play. This is going to be good. (Me trying to positive self talk myself). It was another rough class. I really wasn't ready to be a participant. I was devastated that my anxiety was taking control and not letting me or my daughter have a fun experience with this class. I didn't take her back. It was too soon. I decided I would wait until she was a little older to register her again.

Fast forward a year and a half. She's 3 now and her love for dance and music has grown significantly. She knows whole songs and not just kid songs, but she's belting out songs she's heard on the radio. I decided it was a good time for me to enroll her. She will love it and I think she will do great. First class comes along, she's in daycare now, so she's on a strict schedule with nap time and eating. But I do bring snacks just in case (Mom win). We go in, she is so excited. I am thrilled to see her this happy. She is a little social butterfly so she's making friends, warms right up to her dance teacher. Life is good. She is listening good, I snap some pictures of her dancing her little heart out. This is me living my best mom life. We leave and head home, she tells me about her time in dance class. She loved it and wants to go again. I'm really feeling proud of myself. The last time she was in dance, it was just because she was too young. But now, it's perfect. Now for her second class. Still brought snacks just in case. She napped, she went potty before class started. This is going to be great. I have my camera ready to get all the cute pictures of her dancing. She goes in the class and picks the color she wants to sit on and she sits down. They start their warm up and then quickly move on to some dance moves. She's doing good. She's a little impatient so as the teacher is showing the class what to do, she's right up there with the teacher trying to do the move. The teacher herds her back in line with the other girls, letting her know it's not her turn yet. She's not having it. She doesn't want to be constrained. She wants to dance around the studio. She's not listening. All I hear is the teacher repeatedly calling for Devyn to get back in line or to stand over here. No one else is being talked to, just Devyn. I'm failing as a mom. My kid is making a scene, she's not listening. Great, now she's coming to the door to talk to me. I tell her to go back in line with the other girls and listen to her teacher. She does. But it's short lived. She's dancing around the studio, not listening. Then starts to come to the door again. She loudly blurts out "Mom! I gotta poop!" I don't know why I'm so mortified. Everyone else has kids here. Mine can't be the only one to loudly proclaim their need to poop. I take her hand and tell her let's say potty from now on. We go to the bathroom, she only had to pee, and quickly return to class. She continues to not be listening and running back and forth from her dance spot to the door to talk to me. Looking back on this. I'm not sure why I was so anxious about her not listening. The teacher did a good job of getting her back in line without me interfering. I'm slowly beginning to part ways with my need to be in control at all times. Although the second class was rough. We'll be back again next week. Because we definitely need to learn consistency and perseverance. Anxiety isn't going to win. I win. My daughter wins.